It is such an egocentric way of thinking, really. It well may be pure coincidence, but it does accurately shape my morning mojo. Over years, I've developed the mindset that sleeping is the cure to anything and everything. So if some friends have problems or worries that are bugging them late at night, I would just advice them: Go to bed early, and all will be well tomorrow!
It has always worked for me, especially if I'm bugged down by some worrisome issue or pessimistic thoughts during the day. Its like my mind starts on a clean slate every single morning. Granted, it is a very self-centered way of thinking, because the bullshit is still there, but it makes me happier knowing that I can deal with a problem better in the morning after a good night's sleep!
Still, I went to bed feeling really lousy yesterday. Just the sudden onset of moodiness hit me close to midnight, which left me more annoyed than ever. Perhaps there is a biological aspect attached to it, but these thoughts reinforced one another, and my mind didn't have the ability to will my optimism level up. i wonder if this is how depressed people feel like, to be stuck at this stage and never be able to pull themselves out of it.
Its nights like these that I have the most trouble sleeping, it would just be hours of tossing and turning because I cannot get my mind to shut off. 3 soundtracks later, I finally fell asleep. Woke up to the thought that my Friday was gonna be glorious, but there was no sun streaming through the shutters this morning. Its all cloudy and gloomy outside, plus I know I will have to spend the afternoon finishing my last paper for the week. I'm just so glad I have movie night to look forward to tonight, because there's nothing better than chilling with your friends over a good movie, after a long and arduous week at school.
Still, I'm super bummed that I have to spend my Sunday working on that lighting project. I really wish I hadn't cared so much about wanting to learn about lighting because that is honestly the course that I enjoyed the least. While I can say I have taken away important learning points in my other classes, this is one class that I still have no idea what I'm supposed to be learning. I should have obviously taken A History to Broadcast back then. Its not like I can clear this for a PE, its only getting transferred as an elective. I would have rather taken Ranching or some other course, but I was too influenced by having to 'maximize my education' by supplementing it such courses. The course would have been great, but I just can't seem to define any clear learning outcomes from it.
Ah well, nothing can't be solved with a dose of laughter .
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| LOL! |
A big factor that was contributing to my moodiness is the fact that some people really choose to believe, or they actually believe, that everyone is that gullible and naive. These are the moments when I feel like telling them: I may not be genius, but I'm not THAT STUPID!
And said people expect us to lap up every bullshit that comes our way. Honestly?
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